Why Is There Glitter In My Hair?

"It's in my hair? How the *%^ did it get there?!"

Living with two girls, you are going to run into a lot of things that are not so manly. In our house, the girls like to do Arts & Crafts projects. This makes for an interesting time because sometimes, I am the one who has to clean up afterwards. The remnants of glue, colored paper pieces and glitter all over the table is not as easy to clean up as one might think. It requires me to pick up microscopic pieces of paper that have SOMEHOW gotten glued to the table and since the child can't be bothered cleaning up after herself, I am required to literally take a blowtorch to get some of the things off our kitchen table. However, I digress. Back to the GLITTER!

As I was saying, the glitter not only gets cleaned up, but also has the power to SOMEHOW climb up your body and into your hair. This made me ask, "Why is there glitter in my hair?" The fact of the matter is simple, I just don't feel like I want to be a walking disco ball looking like this all day:

It may be sexy for you, but not for me

So, needless to say, it is an adventure trying to get that out of your hair. Glitter, sure it makes pictures go from BLAH to POW, but it is just that the cleanup is so hard! The outcome of what is creates is always great of course. The glitter takes away the manliness in the man's life. There are many things that take the manliness away and this is only the beginning.

For me, I always thought glitter was something that girls put on to be more "hooker-ish". This is why if you ever go into a strip club, the girls are covered in it. This is why I am not a fan of the glitter. It sure makes your pictures pretty, but I feel that it is teaching something to little girls.....something that doesn't need to come to the light at such an early age. Sure, girls may want to walk around looking like pixies, but I sure don't like it. However, this glitter shortage that I dream about is not going to come soon. Since the wife likes to do her nails, she is amply stocked as if it was her year supply of food storage. Alright, maybe not that bad, but it is too much!